Deja Vu

It's POD 1. And already I remember how to hold a baby and breastfeed. Then there is the itching from all the hospital plasticky linens. And yet how fun it is to play with the bed controls and how uncomfortable hospital beds can be.

Kudos to my gynae who remained calm during my operation. My anaesthetist who got everything right the first go, my plug, my spinal. Everything was practically painless. And I learnt that synflex is waayy better than ponstan and panadol combined. And piriton and morphine will make me really really drowsy.

Welcoming Gabriel Tan

Say hi to Gabriel Tan Kwang Joo.
Born: 9 October 2008
Time: 10:37am
Weight: 3.255kg
Length: 49cm

And Happy Birthday to my father-in-law who turns 69 today!

Ready To Go

It's almost time. I will be checking in to the hospital in a couple of days. I think I've got everything prepared. From the baby's clothes to my nursing stuff. I've dug things out from three years ago and gotten them cleaned. I've even gotten medication for standby in case baby falls sick. And a haircut! The last time was almost half a year ago. I've also bought a brand new Medela electric breast pump. I'm determined to breastfeed for a longer period this time so a new pump is a good incentive.

Meanwhile, Hubbie's taking about a week's leave and Bryan will be missing preschool for a couple of days. My own dad will be down from Malaysia for a few days to see his new grandson. And my mother-in-law will be around to help as well. Everyone's quite excited over the new arrival.

Hopefully, I can get my Wi-fi connected and update everyone. So watch this space!

More Scrapbooking

I'm on leave at the moment, resting and getting ready for baby so it's a good time to finish up my scrapbook. It's a olive green 8" by 8" scrapbook. I'm down to the last few pages of that one. The 8" one is small and rather easy to fill up. But I think I still prefer the big 12" one. I can put more photos on one page and lots of bigger embellishments.

Meanwhile, it's down to the last week before my scheduled C section. Been there before, so it's nothing new. Of course it's still exciting to bring a new life into the world. I find it very fulfilling actually, to have children. But I think this is going to be it. Two is going to be a handful already. And with me and hubbie with full-time jobs, there wouldn't be enough time for more than two. With education being so expensive nowadays, I don't think we can afford to have so many children either.

I think I've made peace with not having a daughter. It's really ok that I wouldn't have someone to pass my beauty and fashion secrets on to. Or that I can't buy all those lovely pink dresses to dress her up in. :) Now I focus on making sure my sons get good daughter-in-laws...

9 Months and Counting Down

It's almost time now. I'm already at 9 months and I have about 2 more weeks to go before my scheduled C-section. It's been quite a tiring 9 months. Thank goodness for my change from a busy government clinic to a quieter private one. Even though I did have to work a couple of evenings a week, it was manageable.

Looking back, the worst part of this pregnancy is the aches and pains. I don't remember my first pregnancy being as bad. I don't have problems when I'm up and about. It's the lying down at night that's giving my the worst backaches. I can't sleep on my back for the past few months. Even turning from right to left wakes me up at night.

Bryan's been quite good these few weeks though. He still wishes baby good morning and good night. He pats my tummy and says hi once in a while. And even in school, his teacher says that he's been quite good. He's learning how to be a bit more gentlemanly and not push or grab stuff. And he's tantrums are more controllable as well.

I think it's all about being consistent. A 'no' should always mean 'no'. Don't give in just because he's screaming away. And it's ok to compromise but always keep your promises. So that he knows that he can trust you when you say that he can have his sweets after dinner/after his nap/tomorrow. Or that he can open his new toy if he has been well-behaved the whole day.

And Bryan's toilet-training is going well too. He only uses his diaper at night and even then, he lets me know when he needs to use the potty to poo instead of doing it in the diaper. He has said a few times that he can sleep in his underwear but I think it's still a little too early for a 3 year old to go completely off diapers. Maybe in a year or two. A 3 year old's bladder is not going to hold for 10 hours.

I'm crossing my fingers that baby is going to be just as good to look after as Bryan. And I hope I can get baby to sleep through the night by the time I get back to work when he is about 4 months.

Oh yes, and happy birthday to Ian and Daddy too!

Scraps of Life

Me and my best friends are quite into this scrapbook thing at the moment. And tiffany-online is in a need of a new makeover before my second one comes along. So up came this design. It's less childish and a little more grownup. Just like my three year old. They grow up so fast!

Meanwhile, I'm stocking up on all these lovely scrapbook papers and embellishments to do while I'm on maternity leave. Somehow I've got to find time for myself with an infant AND an energetic three year old. Well, lots of other mothers out there manage don't they? I'm grateful for my mother-in-law who's always around to help out.

Right now, the big issue is Bryan adjusting to the newborn. He's always been the centre of attention at home so he will feel a bit left out in the first few weeks. Meanwhile, I'm getting bigger by the day. I can't sleep on my back and I can't move very much. I feel like a pig. Counting down the weeks... 4 more to go...

8 Months

1 more month plus to go. It's been quite an easy pregnancy so far. Except the backaches at night. But baby is getting bigger and heavier everyday. According to the scan yesterday, he's now 1.6kg. DEFINATELY a boy. And he's going to DOUBLE his weight in the next 8 weeks. Oh Boy. I already look like I have a watermelon stuffed under my shirt.

Baby on the other hand, seems happy. I felt him hiccup the other day. There is this rhythmic sort of jump that baby makes. Felt really weird. This pregnancy, I seem to be more in tune with baby. I felt him moving much earlier and I can feel which position he is in. I also feel my Braxton-Hicks contractions more this time too.

But it's getting a bit more exciting now. Although most of the stuff I already have, I will still have to set up the nursery and redo Bryan's room. Bryan's going to get a new and bigger bed, so that baby can have his old cot. I hope Bryan will react well to the changes...

7 months and counting!

I'm now 2 months away from my second child. Then it's the sleepless nights all over again. This time I'll also have a 3 year old to look after as well. Hopefully I can find time for hubbie and myself in between.

So far, the whole pregnancy is going well. I'm only just about feeling some water retention now and then. I'm still able to fit into my shoes and my wedding ring. And I'm still tottering about in heels to work. The only aches I get are at night when I get into bed. Somehow being all stretched out lying flat doesn't bode well for my hips and spine. So far no stretch marks and I'm not as itchy as I used to be in my first pregnancy.

Baby's quite active and when he's in the wrong position or sticks his legs or arms into the wrong place, I get the sudden urge to rush to the toilet. But he's growing well, which is the important thing.

Bryan seems to take the whole idea of having a brother quite well. I think he's gotten used to the idea of mommy carrying a baby. He says 'Good night' and 'Hello' to my tummy once in a whole. I hope he'll be just as receptive to Baby once he is born.

For the next two months I'm going to focus on spending time with Bryan and hubbie before baby arrives. I am also going to try to clear up all the errands and work I have to do. Like catch up with my scrapbooking and post blog entries more frequently.

But time stops for no one. And I need more hours in my day.

Blogging Absence

I just realized that I haven't blogged for almost 2 weeks! I must have been busy. Especially at work. I've had a few issues to iron out and then there was the stock take over the weekend as well. So now every tablet, bottle, vial has been accounted for, I can go back to restocking the clinic's medication. Being the main anchor doctor in a clinic is not as easy as it initially looks. But definitely much more interesting and involving.

I've also resolved to spend more time with Bryan before baby Jeremy (??) comes. This weekend, I took him to the club to swim. He really enjoyed himself. He kept dunking his head underwater and kept insisting that I do the same. I think all he needs a pair of goggles and then he is all set to start swimming lessons. So less time to blog and do my scrapbook which is sorely neglected.

Everyone's been asking me if I want a third child since I have 2 boys. But I'm really not sure how much more I can spread myself. There's work and my darling hubbie who has been really patient with me not being around him so often. And then there's Bryan and baby. I guess I'm not ruling out a third child but it's definitely not on the cards for the next few years at least.

Meanwhile, I'm putting on weight. Yikes! And baby seems fine. I don't have backaches, swollen legs or anything much. I just feel really bloated after a full meal. My next checkup is tomorrow.

Doing the Karen Cheng

My favourite Aussie blogger has a group up on Facebook to post fun photos of ourselves in the mirror. I thought I'd give it a try even though I'm already 5 and a half months pregnant. And putting on weight and getting totally paranoid about the dreaded stretch-marks.

I'm still working full time so I have to look somewhat appropriate for work. I don't have very many maternity outfits and my belly is outgrowing all my looser, empire-line stuff. Coincidentally this June, is the Great Singapore Sale. And I managed to pick this lovely dress for only $20, at a nice local boutique for maternity and nursing clothes, 9 Mois. They don't have a large range of clothes but whatever they have is pretty trendy.

Retrospective

This year, there are quite a few of my colleagues/peers who are just about pregnant or just married. Which makes me a step or so ahead of them, with already one son and about to have another child. A lot of people are surprised when I tell them I'm married with children.

Actually looking back, getting married and then having a child at 25 was quite scary for me. I didn't really have anyone to talk to and ask questions as most of my friends were unmarried. And being a doctor, I've heard of all the complications and stuff that can go wrong which made it even worse. I had just started work, it was my first year as a house officer. And I was officially married for one year. I was just barely coping as a doctor and a wife.

But it was by God's grace, He gave me a gorgeous, intelligent son who is mostly well behaved and easy to handle. It made things so much easier on me and gave me so much more confidence in myself. Having a child has changed me, maybe for the better. Now I have someone I need to take care of, who depends on me for everything, and who needs me for the next 20 years of his life at least. It's a huge responsibility, having to teach him, not just about reading and writing, but also about all aspects of life, about relationships, about caring, sharing and all the right principles.

I think I've started to be bit more assertive and less selfish. I only have this much time during the day and I have to maximize it. I do much more planning and I have backup plans for when things crop up. On the other hand, I've also become more flexible and I don't get so upset if I have to cancel plans if someone is sick. I've also stopped trying to make everyone happy. In the end it's the important people in my life that really matters. I've also become more practical and less idealistic. Instead of 'things should be done this way', it's become 'let's try to work with what we have'.

Oddly, my change in attitude shows in the hobbies I do, books I read, shows I watch on tv and even the music I listen to. I used to do cross-stitching, read romances, love soppy dramas and boy band pop. Now, I do scrapbooking and blogging. I prefer watching CSI and the Discovery channel. I'm more interested in Asian based novels and only read romances by Nicholas Sparks. And the latest mp3s I bought and downloaded include artistes like Chris Daughtry, Hinder, One Republic, Maroon 5, Timbaland. I also like good vocalists like Leona Lewis, Colbie Caillat.

And nope I don't think it's the hormones...

Pregnancy Week 8

We went for my first antenatal visit earlier this week. My gynae was one of my consultants before at KKH and I remembered her as being really nice. She didn't disappoint. She spent quite a bit of time with me. Especially doing the ultrasound.

Baby is fine. About 1cm or so. Still very tiny but growing. We saw the hearbeat on the ultrasound, which is reassuring. Mommy is absolutely fine. No nausea, no cravings. Just a little tired. I can't fit into some of my tighter fitting clothes now. I have to wear my looser pants and tops. Thank goodness the fashion these days include lots of empire line tops that flare at the waist. I don't have to specially get maternity clothes just yet.

7 weeks

Baby is now 1cm long and growing at about 1mm a day. Mommy meanwhile is feeling tired and I think I'm getting a little grumpier too. Partly because I've restricted my caffeine intake to 1-2 cups of tea a day. I look and feel bloated now. Can't seem to fit into some of my tighter pants. And I'm starting to wear lower heels too. But yet, no morning sickness...

Pregnancy Week 6

Baby's still tiny at 6 weeks about 5mm and looks like a tadpole. No hearbeat yet but everything's developing.

Mommy has no morning sickness yet thank goodness. I'm not eating very much more but I feel very hungry around mealtimes. I need to keep some snacks around the place. Also no cravings yet. My hubbie's the one with the cravings which he blames on me now.

Bryan seems ok with it. I don't think he understands though. He does say that he wants a baby. But I'm not sure if he knows what he's talking about.

He seems to be doing great in school though. Just yesterday, he came back home and counted 1 to 10 in chinese. So proud of him.

Making A Baby

Yes I'm pregnant. It took us 8 months before the stick came up with two lines instead of one. But actually, i sort of knew. A week before I took the test, I had rather odd, achy and tender breasts. I don't usually get that before my period.

In one of my more recent lectures on fertility, the speaker said that in one year, the chances of a normal couple conceiving is 85%. That's pretty good odds. I'm glad I'm one of them.

Actually, I think couples trying to conceive can get quite stressed out. After all, you get only one chance a month and you don't know if you are pregnant until a couple of weeks later. I previously felt a little disappointed every time my period came. And for me because of my job, I feel a little tinge when a lady comes in and she gets tested and she comes up with a positive test.

But now I'm happy. Very very happy. Now I'm crossing my fingers and praying that baby will be ok.